All That and a Bag of Chips!
Dunes recap of our AKC Inspection:
It was a rainy dark morning, I knew something had Mom extra fidgety, she has been a little sniffly these days, I thought mostly cause Dad was away for 2 weeks doing Army stuff... but she was extra sniffly this morning... then lighting candles to cover up squawking puppy farts ... ! I knew something was up when she gathered files and her laptop from her fancy "no dog zone" office and came down to the kitchen... Then a big white car pulled up.. it looked official! A lady stepped out wearing plastic coverings on her feet like a doctor ...oh gosh... is this an at home neuter job for me??? OMG NO!!!... She seemed pleasant and then flashed her badge ... She's an inspector!!! "its about damn time... "In a minute I'ma need a sentimental Man or woman to pump me up Feeling fussy .." sorry I had that song stuck in my head...back to it the story... Its about damn time!! this joint gets inspected!!! maybe she will take these squawking puppies with her from the house, they've been ruining my restful snoozin' for weeks now... or Princess Mopface!!! YES!!! She then asked about chips, and they used a chip detector on GiGi and Cleo... Mom hasnt bought snacks in a while except for popcorn.. I havn't seen chips in weeks! But sure enough Gigi and Cleo beeped when the chip scanner hit em' ... what the heck? where are these chips? So then the Inspector Gadget Lady wanted to go to the Fancy Dog Kennel... of course she loved my new nemesis Skylar the big floofy chocolate boy that has slobbers that rivals Princess Mopface! Inspector gadget lady called him a beast... what am I chopped liver???? Of course Skylar scanned positive for chips.. so what does this all mean... these dogs in trouble for table scraps??? ok lets get with it... next Princess Mopface!! See ya later sister !!!! but nope... Inspector lady wanted to scan Hazel and Gert... oh gosh... these two fatty Mcfatty sisters are toast, if anyone has been eating chips here its this double stuffed duo! And sure enough Beep, Beep.... been nice knowin' ya girls... that's what y'all get for sneaking snacks!!!
Mom and the Inspector Gadget lady came back to the house... then shuffled some papers and talked about lawyers and my dog doctors Dr. Aaron, Dr. Jean and Dr. Havhav... then it got confusing and they talked about what happens if something happens to Mom and Dad... it got a little confusing with all the big words but Im pretty sure Mom said all their worldly possessions go to Dune Buggy... (finally something that made total sense today!) yes... one day The Great Dune of Pyla will take the throne, and be the King of the PInes!!! (then shit will be changin' around this joint!!!). After all that the Inspector lady, said stuff like "Almost Heaven", "Lucky Dogs" and "Keep up the Great Work"...and just like that she drove off... the rainy clouds seemed to disappear and the sun once again shown down on the Pines... Mom seemed happy, and I was certainly happy.... knowing one day I was going to be King